Finding me. part II

After the events of december, I still find myself looking into a black void trying to remember something, anything that would be part of my life before the events of my suicide and I have been given information by others and nothing that I can find in myself as for my confidence is at a low I can’t explain, when someone tells me something that I can not draw upon it drives me mad with trying to remember. I know with some people It seems like remembering an emotion,, but the details elude me. I feel bad saying that I have to meet a person for the first time again. When I was released from the hospital I did not realize that there was a gap in my memories , Even before I got home i did not even recognize the apartment, the furniture the floors the layout, I found myself dependent on others for location and places of the recent, the more I delved into what i could remember the more i realized that there was a huge hole in my memories in the last 6 years, I feel bad i can not recognize something and it hurts worse that I know that this profound loss of memory hurts others…..

Finding me

I write this post in confusion , the events of my christmas have been harrowing to say the best. I sit in my own thoughts not knowing who i am through memory loss and tragically can not remember a number of years. I know i keep meaning to restart this site and Maybe i should contribute, for my health is not the best and my current status is unknown.

Well now…..

Well after posting for 15 years on my former site I’ve decided that i am going to give this a try again! This site is always dedicated to coffee and the world around me.  So topics will be widely ranged.  I feel now is a good time to restart things and I have mirrored all my old post which I admit was a pain in the ass to move.  So with little fanfare I will say this site is open and the coffee is brewing!

Holy Shit it’s only Tuesday!: A bit on things about things 1.

I know I have not posted too much over the year but I keep saying the same thing, I’ll fucking post at one point. Over the past year I have picked up another hobby- Interest.  Archery.

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You may think what the fuck. in all the interest in the world you come up with that! Well… yes … Yes I have .. Because if your are going to  do something you might as well have fun doing it, In the past year I have had more issues with loosing the ability of moving my arms to a degree.  It’s annoying,  It makes me want to be like an old G I Joe.  if the arm is fucked… add another.  But , Anyways,  I was in therapy at the time and I knew someone that took up archery , Their movements was exactly replicated what I was doing in therapy,  And I thought to myself, Hey….. I can do this and destroy things……?

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Well now… Fuck me I am in! Mind you it has not been the easiest road and Its been a journey into myself that made me realize how much I have lost.  That day I went to a sporting goods store and tried my hand at shopping for a bow. At the very moment you enter a sporting goods store that’s bigger than your average Cumberland farms You will realize three things if you purchase something from a big box store.

  1. As much as the employees give you recommendations… They don’t know shit about things.
  2. The first purchase you make at a big box store in order to acclimate yourself to a new hobby will be a waste.
  3. What ever money you put out you will realize you should of gone to “X store” to begin with.

In those three things you will reflect and end up realizing every mistake you could possibly make is in the first 20 minutes of buying your first bow with no help.  After you buy your first bow you will have delusions of grandeur, The first time you hit the center of the target you think your motherfucking Rambo,  and can take out the army

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But in Archery there is something that will snap you back  into reality faster than an exploding tank. The first time you do it , its an awe inspiring shot of reality of how well you really know archery.

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The first time you do that , You will reflect for a moment of how exactly you fucked up and attempt to never do that again and not two seconds later you will end up doing the same thing like a sadist on the weekend at a convention.

 

In almost a year , I have got some strength in my arms.

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Its a good feeling to be able not to feel like you’re falling apart or even able to pick up things. Even with the advent of this I have my problems, fine coordination is out the window .  but in the very least I  can do a bit more . I figure this is a good starting point for now… but for now this is it and I will add more later.

 

-Mike

 

 

I keep looking at something and my life keeps me insane just enough to figure out I am forgetting this

Yes , I know .. It has been awhile, I am in a cycle of looking and than forgetting to update this site.  It’s deplorable, It’s damn shitty  at that.   This site has existed nearly 11 years and It has had its share of ups and downs.

I feel kind of shitty in the thought I have let this site go to an almost non-existence.  Its been a long three years and I can’t say that It was easy , I can not say it was hard either.  Things are starting to look up. I have my sanity…. Maybe?funny-cat-sanity-crazy-question

Somethings of course are starting to look down. My health has always been a contention in my life, I want to stay healthy and I cant say that I have kept up due to pain.  I live in pain every day.

Phone Fun part 12 Return of the king.

Well now … Back to this ..
If you think about this , If you have followed this little sites quest for the one phone… Its been a long quest. Many have fallen. Much tech support bullshit was had, but to which end  each and every phone was used through and through, so In our eighth year of phone fun I figure why not.. lets visit the classic  style I had originally set as my standard for phones.
The Standard I set in the Samsung M520 post is kind of solid and holds up even to this years phones .

Even If we drop in the most recent acquisition the Nexus 6p  is reviewable with the old standards.

  • to make calls –
    Well this may be the weaker point of the review process but this is more over a fine point , If the provider selling the phone has a shitty network , most will point at the phone before the network.
  • The Phone is configurable
    This is paramount more than ever with phones, as companies try to release  phones with smaller space to save money this is where phones stand up for themselves.
  • good battery life
    Oh holy shit yes. on the most recent generation of phones battery life is in the toilet.
  • add/make ringtones
    Still a valid assumption due to some phones complicating the process needlessly. It may seem redundant but its not.
  • Applications that don’t cost a years pay for a small 3rd world country
    While technically not part of the phone review, you will find that on phones that sometimes phone applications make the phone.
  • Durable
    Yes indeed. durability … still an issue … from you farted and bent your phone in your pocket to a drop accident while taking a dump

I’ve had a few phones since the original phone fun . at a rate of one a year about.

Nexus 6p , Nexus 6 , Galaxy Note 3 , Galaxy Nexus , Nexus 4 s ,HTC Touch , M520 ,katana LX

With the Nexus line being the phones I’ve favored and when I have strayed I have been reminded why the stock experience is the way to go. My last non-stock devices were less than appealing in the long run.

 

So onwards with this review.

Again the old review process in play here lets start from the beginning..

 

To make Phone calls: The nexus 6p is very good at making phone calls , On the other hand places I’ve lived have been questionable at best for phone calls. Now the nexus 6p has the ability to hand off phone calls from WIFI to NETWORK to NETWORK flawlessly … When it works its fucking fabulous , When it does not work you wonder if the call was transferred  to a demons asshole for the weird noises it can make.. if this hand off can be straightened out it will turn a great feature into a brilliant feature.

Configurable: Being a Nexus phone give this phone advantage over most of the android phones out there.  Google give you a frame with a Warp engine and allows you to build off of It.  Rather than be stuck with provider baked in bullshit that reminds you to wipe your ass twice before swiping google trusts you enough to know how to download something.

good battery life: Unfortunately smart phones have one of a  few drawbacks… The battery life sucks and while building better and faster hardware seems to be the case of things , I can say the Nexus is not half bad. I get roughly 24 to 48 hours depending on use.

add/make ringtones:  Over the years this has become a redundant with configurable , Though it would be a subsection because who knows what the fuck developers are thinking .

Applications that don’t cost a years pay for a small 3rd world country: While this still has importance , the shift away from a per phone store is now a marketplace.  Out of the box this phone is more or less ready to go… I think one complaint that other manufacturers should pay attention to is.. STOP FUCKING INSTALLING APPS YOU THINK I WILL USE! IF there is something I have hated with the non-nexus phones was spending an hour getting rid of app after app of completely monkey shit.  Nexus phones do not do this.. its wonderful. But, When you have a phone with a notification going off in the middle of the night to remind you to put in your store loyalty card , you bet your ass that app is going to get deleted. in the past there were many purchases i made to fix the faults of phones that is not a litter of dead apps that i don’t use .

Durable: Durability , as it stands is kind of a moot point these days.  Unfortunately when you have a phone where one side is a large piece of glass , its hard to judge durability .. Most manufactures tend to sacrifice durability for aesthetics , The problem of aesthetics is …. the only way you see how “nice” your phone is , is if you go naked. These days its saner to just put a case on your phone to make it durable.  if you look at your phone the wrong way sometimes even with gorilla glass 473487234 your phone will end up fucked by a single micron of dust.

 

Over all the Nexus 6p is a comfortable sight. Its what you expect out of a google phone rather than the aborted attempts that manufactures try to collaborate with wireless providers for.  the nexus line is about choice and its something that people do not realize they have when they are stuck in the world of samsungs that want to sniff your asshole for caloric content to sell to who knows what.