Category: Media

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Attack of the Christmas part III

Another year another holiday , What used to be called Christmas creep to me is now attack of the Christmas. When they started Christmas stuff in October I was angry, but now it seems we cant get the fuck through summer without some sort of Christmas.  Every Year we are losing the war on Christmas , soon we are going to get Christmas advertisements in April .. I was walking through a store in AUGUST… and what do I see to fill me with enough rage to make me light plastic santa clauses on fire… this…..

20140825_170952Are you fucking kidding me… ?

My answer to this ..

Nuke_itStores wonder why there Christmas sales are so poor around Christmas. They do not think that forcing christmas down our throat early and earlier is a bad thing. Actually it is . It starts to wears people out faster when they start having christmas music vomited out of every speaker in store just to get in the “spirit” of shopping.  This does not get me in the spirit at all, moreover it gets me in the spirit of getting the fuck out of that store faster.  In the long run companies lose out on profits by spreading out christmas more because people are like likely to impulse buy with christmas that is months and months away. Instead they will make decisions that will save some money and not do the christmas rush.  Not that I support the christmas early thing, but it spreads a lesser profit over a year and actually could result in less profits for the company.  These companies should put christmas back where it belongs after thanksgiving and focus on that time rather than bitch and moan that black friday was a huge loss.  Well fucking Duh …. People bought all there shit in August when you started putting your shit out.

If you give me the choice of proctology by hand grenade or Christmas music in the middle of the year. I will most definitely take the hand grenade thank you .  It is less painful and it gets you out of listening to the Christmas music.

2ngZocA

As far as advertisements are concerned K-mart has earned a special place in hell this year.  They put on a commercial for christmas by saying it was not a Christmas commercial. They seriously need a lesson in fucking timing.

They use weasel wording to get around the topic that its a christmas related commercial and try to act coy about it .  By saying its not christmas and having santa drive by in a handicap cart … wow fuck you K-mart.  Whoever the suit at K-mart thought this was a great idea should have a polar ice cap shoved up his ass.

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And weird news out there. sorority cow house has taco night… Explosion Injuries one.

Flatulence from 90 cows in a German barn sparked a methane gas explosion that damaged the building and left one cow slightly injured with burns, police said Tuesday.

“In the barn for 90 dairy cows, methane built up for unknown reasons and was probably ignited by a static discharge, exploding in a darting flame,” said local police in the central town of Rasdorf in Hesse state.

“Parts of the roof cover were slightly damaged and a cow suffered minor burns,” said police, adding that a fire crew rushed to the scene of Monday’s accident and a gas field crew later measured methane levels.

Aside from the taco joke, That has to be sight to be seen. cow farts gone critical.ff_684Bessy the night before had Indian food, When questioned she was not aware of her emissions till she had lit up a smoke for the night . 36d24ef061b8367cc2c50b98d3548f62a22d99235b9eff2f064883c0db7c61bf

Must be a slow news day….

 

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Dunkin Donuts unveils coffee flavored donuts …….. WTF?

Apparently Dunkin Donuts just does not get it… they have completely lost connection with there customer base.  They have released a Coffee flavored donut… Denis Leary has an opinion to this new donut.

Denis LearyDunkin Donuts has lost there fucking minds.  They are going to make coffee flavored donuts but not coffee fucking flavored coffee. Most dunkin donuts you walk into you have a shot in the dark on getting a coffee that is remotely drinkable for long.  Generally when you order and iced coffee and use the system of dunkin donuts that they have , You can get an ok flavored coffee but when its hot outside by the time you walk 50 feet from the store you are drinking coffee water.  Its an annoying prospect, it makes you want to fire your coffee like a hand grenade that really has no gratification.

The Glazed Coffee Creme donut is made with a glazed yeast shell and filled with coffee buttercream. It’s topped with a drizzle of chocolate icing. The Coffee, Creme & Sugar Donut is also made with a glazed yeast shell and stuffed with coffee butter creme and topped with powdered sugar. The two donuts will only be available for a limited time at participating Dunkin’ Donuts locations.

At a guess these donuts maybe a better flavor than their coffee , who knows I might stick a straw into a donut and just see.  Honey Dew donuts on the other hand has gone to another extreme they have made a Maple Bacon donut.. Breakfast overload! They are not fucking around…

omg-bacon-funny-catWhile bacon is good, Putting bacon on everything on the fucking planet just doesn’t work all the time.

  82442934

No!baconlube1

WTF?bb3

MMMMM bacon tits…. but no.BaconSandwichYES! FUCKING BACON SANDWICH…

Anyways… enough bacon.. Dunkin Donuts is so proud of their new donuts they have put out a press release for it .

Dunkin’ Donuts also unveiled new Coffee Creme Donuts, the brand’s first donuts made with Dunkin’ Donuts’ famous Original Blend Coffee.

Utoh… re-read that… made with Dunkin’ Donuts’ famous Original Blend Coffee.. Joy! Boiled ass in donut form now! Rather than fuck with a time tested recipe for donuts .. why not make… COFFEE??? If Denis Leary walked into a dunkin donuts right now he’d go on a rampage , smoke 17 packs of cigarettes than go on the hunt for the elusive coffee flavored coffee.

Mind you these day the closest coffee places to me are Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks… its like a personal hell of coffee drinking, I’ve gone from getting coffee out of the house to getting coffee from the coffee maker. The last trip I made to starbucks was a 15 minute wait while 5 people could not figure out how to make coffee…. it was a strange and awe inspiring journey into a strange land, my hope for coffee places fades as they fuck about, I am  waiting for the release of Bacon flavored sour patch kid coffee from either place at this rate.

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Stupid is as Stupid does with your star Sarah Palin.

I was reading up on the current situation on the  oil spill and i’ve noticed that every day that the oil spill is slowly mutating into something else.

It seems that BP is trying there damnedest to hide the severity of this oil spill. On may 20th i started to notice the whitewash  with bp using the national guard to block reporters from beaches. There’s just a huge ass attempt to hide this spill, I have said this already but, its getting fucking ridiculous.  I am sure in the states closer to the oil spill people are more aware, In the north-east US its like a passing knowledge of the spill.

Even Sarah Palin is getting in on the action, From her twitter account she posted

So..because BP, subcontractors & govt screwed up WE get punished w/energy tax that jacks prices & kills jobs & opportunity?Nope,wrong answer about 4 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

Hey wackowoman of the west. .. we’ve not forgot your little comment.

another comment from sarah on her facebook page.

Extreme deep water drilling is not the preferred choice to meet our country’s energy needs, but your protests and lawsuits and lies about onshore and shallow water drilling have locked up safer areas. It’s catching up with you. The tragic, unprecedented deep water Gulf oil spill proves it.

We need permission to drill in safer areas, including the uninhabited arctic land of ANWR. It takes just a tiny footprint – equivalent to the size of LA’s airport – to tap America’s rich and plentiful oil and gas up north. ANWR’s drilling footprint is like a postage stamp on a football field.

Uhh drilling platforms have the same footprint ..  Not to mention the SECOND bp spill thats currently in the state of alaska as we speak. So ms palin .. the sane people of America would like to say a big fuck off to your drilling on land is safer with ….

On Tuesday, Pump Station 9, at Delta Junction on the 800-mile pipeline, busted. Thousands of barrels began spewing an explosive cocktail of hydrocarbons after “procedures weren’t properly implemented” by BP operators, say state inspectors “Procedures weren’t properly implemented” is, it seems, BP’s company motto.

Few Americans know that BP owns the controlling stake in the trans-Alaska pipeline; but, unlike with the Deepwater Horizon, BP keeps its Limey name off the Big Pipe.

Its just funny, has she not looked at the window at “russia” lately  to see a spill from BP in her OWN backyard? I know the Alaskan spill is much smaller, but how is it “Safer”?

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Time: Top 10 most dangerous foods. ORLY?

Every now and than I find an article that just makes me go WTF. It starts off .

Top 10 Most Dangerous Foods

The American Academy of Pediatrics released a policy statement on Feb. 22, recommending the labeling and possible redesign of hot dogs to prevent choking deaths among children. Here’s a look at 10 risky foods

So it basically starts off as “Since hot dogs killed some amount of people, Here are foods that we think are dangerous and cause controversy. but the list gets rather silly. Here’s tonight’s top ten list…. (seriously with the foods they include David letterman should announce this one. Bold Stuff is Comments by me.)

Eat at Your Own Risk

1. Hot Dogs:  Common sense issue. CHEW YOUR FOOD!
2. Fugu: blowfish? are you kidding me. how many times in your life do you eat this one?
3. Ackee: Random Food that You’ve likely never eaten
4. Peanut Panic: This shit answers itself. Notice its Peanut Panic and not nut allergies.
5. Leafy Greens: does not belong on list- wash your damn food first , I know this doesn’t work for restaurants. Unless of course its killer tomatoes.. than run
6. Not Exactly Sweet as Pie: Rhubarb… And this one gets the stupid award. Eating  the leaves can lead to poison but the article misstates a certain issue. You’d Have to ingest 11pounds of it in order to die.
7. Tuna Tremors : You can stop sucking on broken thermometers and start eating tuna!
8. Cassava: This one I’m leaving alone.

9. Coffee: Coffee…… Really? Just wait for it.. Lets pour on the stupid, From the article “. In 1992, McDonald’s had some trouble when 79-year-old grandmother Stella Liebeck of New Mexico sued the fast-food company because a scalding cup of 170° coffee caused third-degree burns over 6% of her body, including her thighs, buttocks and groin. Liebeck was awarded $2.86 million (the amount was later reduced in a settlement).”
10. Mushrooms: No no lets go back to 9 , everything else on this list is either, use common sense, or stupidity.

The Fact they even put coffee on the list and the reasoning is beyond me.  But, what they point out coffee for being dangerous is ridiculous.   Say! Lets open this scalding hot coffee between my legs! Yes. that’s the idea you want to bring to your readers.  I know… this was before the time of the whole cup warning thing.

Every coffee cup sold these days has that warning, Call it common sense but, apparently some people don’t have it.  Who knew that hot coffee was hot? Shit whats next Water is wet? I know I’m being a bit angry with this one and yes someone did get severely injured.  But to put a warning out on coffee being one of the most “Dangerous” foods.  Also “Leafy Greens” What is the times trying to do make everyone so neurotic over food that they end up in a Psych ward? They go out of the way to explain how ZOMG bad these things are but do no explain what good these things do.

In this article there is an AMAZING amount of disregard for any sort of good practice in writing. Half-asses sources half truths and willingly causing fright. Also most of the issues are from the retail side of things as in bad preparation, questionable practices and such. Not many people are going to be going “Honey LETS CUT SOME BLOWFISH TONIGHT WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”

As Far as the times. They wonder why print is going out of style like the dinosaurs.

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is 1080p Really worth it?

Since buying a monitor with a HD tuner  in march I’ve been watching some tv but a pattern has emerged that I’ve noticed.  The lack of 1080p tv, Even though that all the major providers say they have HD , it seems like the definition is about as tangible at best.  There is lack of 1080p on tv itself.

Since the introduction of  “HD” there seems to be a downhill slide of quality of the programing what was on tv a year ago seems to be in a better quality than today’s HD.  Mostly you notice the highest quality in sporting events. but if you look at a sporting event today you’d notice that there either using compression or a lower quality camera than before.

I have to laugh when it comes to the sale of a TV with the push of “OMG IT DOES 1080p!” In most cases with that the difference between 1080i/p 720p is going to be barely noticeable. Best Buy has there 1080p caroling commercials on lately and it begs this question…

Is 1080p worth it?

personally my opinion is NO unless all you do is watch movies all day as far as a tv is concerned. You can get along just fine with a 720p TV (which will likely do 1080i) . The HD market is a bad place theres alot of market speak that would leave ANYONE confused.

If you buy a TV to watch TV the best thing to do is save yourself perhaps hundreds of dollars by getting a 720p tv , if your the mad movie watcher or have a PC hooked to the TV 1080p is the way to go.

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Mind over matters, E3’s motions controllers. (project natal)

After following the news for E3 for awhile I knew MS and Sony would announce there motion controllers.  The funny thing that comes to mind is that for 2 years most people complained that the wii motion controls were a gimmick .. alrighty than.

Interesting yes but, As far as the Microsoft motion controller is concerned it has many faults that are not pointed out.  I could point out that this system is the eye toy but thats been beaten to death with a dead horse. From the demos I have seen there are seemingly a lot of lag time in motion to screen reaction, at one point in on of the demos you could clearly see that the person and on screen avatar were completely out of sync, The wii’s controls seemed more in sync than this and I’m curious that the people playing around with natal were just in a state of ZOMG NEW TOY mode rather than objectively using the device.

The second thought of this is natal with more than one player it just doesn’t seem like it will even work,  If it does it maybe more a space issue since your stuck in the field of view of the lens. Just imagine trying to play rabbids in the point of view of a camera with two or even 4 people, Hospital visits would rise to the point of Armageddon and Bruce Willis would have to be sent in to nuke your console.  From another site

Natal is so smart, in fact, that, if your room is narrowed by a pair of couches, it can signal to a game to narrow the level. It can see about 15′ x 20′ of a room, according to project leader Kudo Tsunoda’s informal estimation.

(this was part of a post I made on june 5th but I decided to hold off to see if this held water or not.  I left this part of the post originally to show where my thinking was at the time. Anyways)

2 weeks later and finding out where the motion controller is now, and many articles later.

gamemediasites

Sony’s motion controller seems to be playing the same Houdini game where its a announced and disappears. I think its because its closer to the wii controls and everyone’s uppity about the project Nu-toy, As i had Started to point out the Microsoft Motion controller seems to have more faults than positives.  Even further It seems that the technology in this “controller” (to which i lightly say) implemented is going to confusing as fuck compared to the normal – In a video of them playing burnout paradise it looked closes to step dancing for dummies playing that game. Car Racing games is not really the best format to show responsiveness.  Microsoft here has put up the unicorns farting rainbows approach to marketing this device, Hyping the living hell out of it.  It almost feels like a Fail in motion.

the second thing about the microsofts control setup is that all gaming sites have jumped on this like its the best advance since pong(again eye-toy).  As far as I’ve seen with the pre-natal, It just seems more of a “gimmick” than the wii-mote, I mean since “you” are the controller do you really think people are going to play Halo with this? also the lack of a device will make the experience more confusing, it will basically come back to the hell people went through of getting the powerglove to work  right.

Everyone’s gone bullshit over this to the point of gollum and the one ring.  but as far as the experience is concerned microsoft is expecting you to fill in too many blanks, There has to be some device in between to work and feel correct.

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You kin do it! donuts *barf*

Dunkin Donuts is at it again with  a new advertising campaign but,  I can’t help but laugh every time I’ve seen the commercials. “You kin do it!” But, Seeing the words makes me think of another thing besides brand recognition.

Dunkin Donuts has appearently spent $100million on this new campaign which i find funny. The Waterboy movie on the otherhand spent $23 million making the movie and by any figure the 18 seconds of time Rob Shneider spent saying that line in the movie cost $76662.  Dunkin spent $100,000,000 on this so far in three 30 second TV spots.  So really it would be just cheaper to hire Rob Shneider for 90 Seconds at $383,310 vs $100 million. And people wonder why businesses are crying for a bailout?

waterboy_2

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Wii have a problem with Media? Media Thinks your Wii is going to kill or injure you….

Recently I’ve seen alot of news on how the wii “injures” people and at first I was going to ignore it but, Instead of going away its just grown into the flavor of the month of Media trying to scare people.  Reading this article is pretty hilarious on its own because of how badly its sourced and the numbers they are coming out with. anyways on to the goods.

The article starts in huge letters

Wii puts 10 in hospital a week

Wow…. so they bait you with that. what the hell is the Wii doing beating people down who play Xbox? Its very interesting how an inanimate object is “putting” people into the hospital.

The growing toll has prompted NHS doctors to warn of the dangers. Wii-itis sufferers usually have excruciating pain in the right shoulder or knee.

The Toll? WII IS ON A RAMPAGE!!!! LOOK OUT ITS GOING TO CAP YOUR ASS! no, seriously this bugs me because usaully the people ending up hurt by the wii are either playing like jackasses or have no concept of moderation. They fail to state the conditions leading up to whatever caused the injuries, in most cases the Game system did not cause the injury the person caused the injury themselves by not following instructions,  reading further…

A rheumatology consultant said: Most are admitted after playing the tennis and running games which involve sudden movements and violent tendon stretching. Dr Dev Mukerjee, of Broomfield Hospital, Chelmsford, Essex, said: There has been a 100 per cent increase in patients complaining of Wii-itis.

I don’t know about this it sounds like a load of bullshit to me,  Tennis maybe , Running ? What the hell? Even with wii fit it tells you not to slam down on the board, so again this comes back to the person playing the game. I’ve seen some people who play the Wii and use crazy amounts of force or movements while playing, When you play the wii you dont have to swing the controller like your hacking an axe through a tree, using fairly slow movements can actually acheive the same results as swinging like a madman.

Thinking about it further something about this article stinks badly enough to think a landfill with used diapers is nearby and someone is just trying to get there 15 minutes of fame, my logic is the numbers dont play out. Think about this for a moment, This asshats are just playing with numbers to make them look alot worse than they are.

10 People a week get “injured”, in 52 weeks that means only 520 people get injured in a years time. Given the population of the world. Your chances of getting “injured” by the Wii beating your ass in any given day is  0.0000077%, There something seriously wrong with this. This doctor is Should not even be considered remotely useful. if you really think about this

the odds of you getting injured by your Wii is

1 in 12,884,615ish

Lets look at the odds of things than your  Wii Injuring you and see how retarded this article is for all its worth.

  • becoming president: 1 in 10,000,000
  • dying from parts falling off an airplane: 1 in 10,000,000
  • dying from contact with hot tap water: 1 in 5,005,564
  • dying from food poisoning: 1 in 3,000,000
  • winning the lottery (single state): 1 in 18 million
  • being struck by lightning: 1 in 2,650,000
  • killed in an airplane accident: 355,318 to 1
  • asteroid colliding with Earth in the next 100 years: 5,500 to 1
  • becoming an astronaut: 12,100,000 to 1
  • drowning in the bathtub: 693,000 to 1
  • dying due to a shark attack: 300,000,000 to 1

The news networks and various blogs are Picking up the story and focusing on the injury end, where the statistics speak for themselves. its all Silly medias fascination and irresponsibility with scaring people with stuff that is next to impossible to happening and the fact they blame the machine rather than the person is just poor writing on there behalf.  From the articles i’ve found theres no stated sources, no actual facts, No history, and no clues to the actual cause of this.