I just realized something… it’s fucked up alright…. Yes , there has not been a coffee post in ages…
For the coffeecommander to make such an error .. this has to be fixed for the one that drinks more coffee than the combined amount of water in the great lakes..
Now for my situation has changed and I’ve had to take some concessions… While I do have access to Honey Dew Donuts at times due to the harsh winter I’ve had to goto Dunkin Donuts …. A lot.. The problem is most cities and towns will bitch when residents do not shovel their walk, Yet when a business does not do it they seem to get a blind eye. With the choice of walk to dunkin while getting killed because you have to walk in the road versus walking triple the distance in the road and getting killed because its a major artery through the city, I chose the lesser of two chances of death . But, With that I take an even greater risk with my coffee. I usually order the same coffee year around, and being there so much you’d think one of the donut droids would get my coffee after a time? FUCK NO… they say its easy to order a coffee from Fuckin Gonuts.
This picture I’ve posted makes it look easy… but, You have a better chance of beating Arnold Schwarzenegger at one liners. At first I’d order my coffee like I used to when I had a Honey Dew down the street. Large iced coffee , Large , Milk with sugar on the dark side..
I’ve always ordered my coffee on the dark side because it keeps them from making the same screwed up mistake you’d think they would learn after the nine billionth time, If you try to match consistency with cream with milk, that’s not coffee you’re getting. You’re getting a milk flavored with coffee at that point. I’ve tried everything with drunkin donuts to get my coffees right and its just a miracle when they did until I noticed something. When they ring your order up to make it they go through a very convoluted route to do so with the register. I don’t know if they track coffee metrics if there is such a thing, but they do take your order through the register with stunning accuracy. but, that’s where the accuracy ends.
If you look at this example receipt, Its very telling to an anal level. One hot coffee medium 1 skim milk 2 equal. Again… why the hell that’s on the receipt is beyond me . I really don’t think its for customer gratification.. I can’t see someone opening a coffee and slamming the receipt down yelling about how there was only supposed to be 2 equal in there but he can taste 5. As soon as your order completes the next steps as far as a dunkin droid making your coffee is near black magic as far as I can figure. But using terms like “regular milk”, “Extra sugar” and dark gets you a fucking science project every time where you can only guess the contents. There are very few dunkin donuts I trust to order a coffee with little input as possible, very rarely I’ll say at dunkin donuts “large iced coffee, milk, with sugar.” Getting back to the register though.. If you order your coffee and with somewhat fair amount of consistency, and you are a regular at a particular dunkin donuts. Watch the register, if you see what the person puts in on the amount of Milk or cream (pick your poison) and sugar. By watching that you can go back to that dunkin donuts and with some amount of accuracy you can get a repeat performance on coffee service. Asking for regular milk on the numbers they input into their registers I’ve seen everything from 3 to 7 on that. funnier is the machines they use are funny as hell because calibration is different from week to week and even day to day at times, You’d think with a machine to help along the process to make your coffee they would be pretty static on how much milk is in your coffee. Not even close.. Asking for 1 milk one day will sometimes get you this much
about a thimbles worth..
or
This monster fuckload of milk
Sugar of course has the same issues at dunkin. I cut down on sugar completely after having coffee with more than an inch of sugar in the bottom. So again at dunkin donuts I have mitigated how much sugar by going by numbers. its not fool proof but it works.
Saying extra sugar at dunkin donuts appeases the Brimely Overlord.
It all feels like a damn science to order a damn coffee from Dunkin Donuts, At honey dew I’ve never had that issue and even if they do screw up usually its a one timer if you turn up again.
The final point on dunkin donuts and honey dews coffee is the most confusing one. they both order from the same distributor for their grinds… yet, the coffees are so astronomically different its confounding. If you let your ice melt in a dunkin donuts coffee the flavor is just … water coffee… there’s no way around it the coffee is done. If you do the same with honey dew, even after the ice as melted you still get a pretty good tasting -ice coffee.
So, at this point i cant wait for warmer weather and a bit of a longer walk for better coffee , I’d just rather have good taste than need a mathematics and science degree to order a fucking coffee.